Adoption = Perfect Product Placement
By Trace A. DeMeyer (author-adoptee-blogger at American
Indian Adoptees)
In south Chicago in the 1950s, my 22-year-old mother imagined
my father, 28, would marry her since she was pregnant with me. That didn’t
happen.
Did my birthmother’s family support her and allow her to
keep me? That didn’t happen.
I was illegitimate but I wasn’t an orphan since I had two
parents. Did the state contact my father and ask him to raise me? No. That didn’t happen.
After an orphanage then foster care, the damage done in
those months is not something I can describe in words but I only wanted to be
with my natural mother. That didn’t happen.
The couple who adopted me had miscarried twice and I was
supposed to be the replacement. I had my own DNA and my own ancestors but that
didn’t matter. They expected me to be their lost child. That didn’t happen.
I was not supposed to question anything. When I decided I
wanted to know who I was, what happened and why I was adopted, I asked my
adoptive family for information and the truth. That didn’t happen.
The social worker convinced my mother I was better off with new
parents who she never met. Did the social worker tell my mother I would be
emotionally distraught, devastated and mentally damaged from being abandoned?
No. That didn’t happen.
The church and the state were supposed to conduct interviews
and home inspections. Did they find out my adoptive father was a raging alcoholic.
Did they stop him from molesting me? No. That didn’t happen.
My natural mother probably thought the church and state and
the social worker would protect me after adoption. Did the social worker check
on me? No. That didn’t happen.
Many of my adopted friends were sexually molested as teens
by their adoptive fathers and other relatives. Will the adoption industry ever admit
or release these statistics? No. That sadly isn’t happening.
The adoption industry peddles perfect product placement called
babies to people who miscarried, some desperate to raise a child. Do they tell
them babies are “blank slates” who will love them unconditionally? Yes. That
does happen.
Trace blogs at www.splitfeathers.blogspot.com. Her adoptee memoir "One Small Sacrifice" is available on Amazon and Kindle.
